Vacuum-A space entirely devoid of matter.

Depression now brings up it’s most brutal/fiendish chapter. Emptiness , a noun; pronounced as – “em-tee-nuhs”. A 9 letter word enough to cause self-wreckage. Every individual senses emptiness in their own different way. Something missing in their life , moving away / loss of loved ones – being one of the ways how emptiness is felt. A feeling of waking up every morning with nothing to look up to. You are alive or dead ,totally irrelevant -a victim’s thought that life has got no meaning. Zero interest or excitement – one tries to drag oneself away from friends and family.

This period is no less than a solitary confinement. An isolation – where even hope might take several years to penetrate. You are hurt and you don’t know what exactly but something keeps bothering you constantly. Giving your physical attendence in the present, mentally you are lost somewhere in dark and unable to use your senses to get a fix on anything.

Numbness , a noun ; pronounced as – ” nuhm-nuhs”. Yes, numbness can also be felt ! You start losing your ability to perceive emotions . You stop feeling love and sooner than you think one forgets what love once felt like. There is a steady search for happiness in others. A different side of the same you is revealed. This different side is vulnerable to take terrible paths.

The mind , stressed with all the overthinking tries to constantly fill the big void of emptiness within. The different side of you is extremely scared to face the reality.This different side in partnership with the mind makes the person escape reality by harmful means. The person gets addicted to escaping reality as in the virtual world he is blissful , where everything is well scripted , how he wants them to be. Who wouldn’t want such a world where everything starts with you and ends with you?

Addiction. Easiest available ticket to escape reality!

Drug addiction is a chronic brain disease. It tricks the brain into thinking that drugs are essential despite negative consequences. Addiction compels individuals to go to great lengths to acquire their drugs of abuse. Many people with depression or anxiety use drugs and alcohol to try and cope. It is very common, for men in particular, to try to mask or block out the symptoms of depression or anxiety by using alcohol or other drugs, which only makes the symptoms worse.

loneliness.

An air of ceaseless despondency !

Replies getting late, chats getting shorter,topics getting over – we see a once well-nourished friendship dwindling more often nowdays.

You go on a trip for a short span of time and when you come back to rejoin your old pals, you learn- your once boon companions have now left you for the same nature and character which they once loved about you. They are now ashamed of your company which they once favoured. You feel used – giving your everything to some people who never became yours.

Here comes a juncture of loneliness. Daytime, you have the company of your shadow but at night the shadow too leaves you- all alone brawling with the darkness within.

Toxic Friendship. We see people know lyrics to each other’s song , their elbows echo in tune. What if i can’t hum a key ? What if my melodies are the ones nobody hears?How long before I am lost for good? Toxic friendships are the worst of all kind – getting away from this is the best option , do it even if it costs you everything.

In such toxic friendships we keep swallowing what we thought was air. Seriously , Why do I need someone? I am a daughter to a father. A sister to a brother. A friend to a friend. What am I to myself ? I AM SUFFICIENT. Sufficient for myself.

Story Build up.

Well-nigh every movie has it’s first half spent in building up the story for the real action to follow. As I open my life’s script to you all with a seemingly decent direction , I want you all to soak the best parts from this script and never forget – “You are not alone”.

In a developing country like India opening about your mental health to the society makes you the “unwanted homo sapien”. This ends-up making the victim’s condition more worse. Thanks to the broadcasting media surrounding us like Netflix presenting series like – 13 reasons why and many more , people now somewhat have opened up about this issue. Citizens are now starting to show about decent amount of concerns related to their offspring’s state.

About 800,000 people die by suicide worldwide every year, of these 135,000 (17%) are residents of India, a nation with 17.5% of world population. Why is it always that only after a cataclysm we tend to wake? when from the first grade we are taught that-“precaution is better than cure”. Precautions like checking up on your collegues , becoming their emotional support if not able to physically be there for them. Believe me ,this is more than enough. Just talk to them.

Protected sex and a good mental health both have the same level of seriousness and gravity of content. Then Why is that Indian schools, especially – provide for sex education sessions and do absolutely nothing for mental health awareness? Schools in India : An institution which provides only for theoretical knowledge , gives no shit about practicality. What’s the point of making students learn by-heart Merchent Of Venice (a play wriiten by William Shakespeare) for two years straight ? which they are going to forget in a month’s time or probably sooner.

Question: If people are suffering so much from depression or other mental issues then why don’t they just confess and ask for help directly?

Confession. Confession meaning : a formal statement admitting that one is guilty of a crime. What crime? A crime of not being able to fit in a particular peer group for being different or being a foodie, too fat before the judgemental eyes of the society?

From a victim’s point of view – we assume being a teenager, opening up would make us more unwanted by our peers but still we try to communicate through our change in behaviour and emotions. We are often misread.

In this world of Instagram, fame and fakeness – people like me get strangled. We try discussing our issues , only one (or sometimes none) seem to care but fail to actually decode us – thinking this mood will pass soon. We try to tell that our miles and miles of skin holding our thoughts inside is now scarred to the limit.

I want people like me to fight their inner demons with me as we proceed with my script. You are not alone!